Honey, Please

Dear Readers,

My Capital One VISA bill is $8k this month, so please feel free to Venmo some cash to cover it. I think it is the least you could do for 20 years of fantastic content.  I’m already expecting a barrage of one cent or two cent contributions, so I’m ahead of you wiseguys.

I had a nice lunch at the Sheraton across from Stanford on Friday.  One of my high school classmates, who has a PhD from there, was being honored later that day, so all my Bay Area classmates showed up to hang out. I missed the 50th reunion in 2024 due to my back surgery, so it was fun to have a mini reunion. I sent my brother some pics, since he was just a year ahead and knows everybody. I try to keep the lines of communication open with my siblings in order to avoid this type of situation.

Thanks to our illustrious Presidential administration, we now have a new unit of measurement.  The first go-round gave us the Scaramucci, which is 11 days. And now we have the Zacharia, which is five. And in less than a Scaramucci and a Zacharia, we hopefully get to celebrate the blue wave all the polls are indicating. I’m hearing the suburban Texas moms are souring on Ken Paxton, regardless of the horseshit that the right is making up about Talarico. Kenny boy is the perfect candidate, for the Democrats.

We headed to the No Kings protest at Ocean Beach on Saturday along with the numbers and their SOs, as well as some newly minted friends.  My wife scanned a QR code and gave $50 to somebody named Brad. I’m sure Brad Pitt appreciated it, but he really doesn’t need it. After the event, we had lunch at the Beach Chalet.  Several of us had the ahi tuna roll but none of us were impressed by it, but what the hell do you care.  Below is a picture of us.  We were all in the O, except for #1, who was recruited to be one of the flag holders.

I hit the posh club a couple times this past week and was able to grab a lane even though the indoor pool is still closed. When I was there Wednesday, I thought Mel Blanc was in one of the shower stalls.  This cat was creating at least three or four unique voices. I finally saw him pop out. He was an old dude I had seen around before. Maybe I’ll try my Sylvester Stallone on him next time I see him. Yo, Adrian.

I have not worked on my week 7 NFL pics.  I’ve gotten smacked around the last two weeks and am currently in a tie for 27th place. The only light at the end of the tunnel is practically everyone else picked the teams that got upset yesterday.  It looks like the Rams are not the Super Bowl team everybody was talking about in pre-season.  If the Niners win tonight, which every expects, at least I’ll be .500 for the week. As soon as you send that cash, I can make some week 7 bets.

 

Cleveland Rocks

My friends at Pigs, Goats and Elephants had an outage around 1am Friday morning.  They sent me a text to let me know, but I was already aware as my CPAP, the machine that keeps me alive at night, was not functioning. Fortunately, I did wake up a few hours later after sleeping commando, so to speak. Unfortunately, the power was still out. My wife called so I whined to her a little about how I’d have to go out for coffee.  We had a nice chat. She had just wrapped up a visit with the Wig and CC and was hanging out with Charley in lovely western MA for a few days. Then she’s off to NYC.

I ended up at Toast in Town for coffee and breakfast. They open at 9am, which seems odd to me for a breakfast joint. This outing reminded me of the late 70s Binghamton days when I’d get the 99-cent special: two eggs, potatoes and toast. This time I added coffee, bacon and a fruit salad. With my normally generous tip, the bill came to over $30. I guess you gotta expect that because of five decades of inflation and Bay Area rents. My usual bowl of oatmeal with peanut butter probably runs about 50 cents so I guess I can splurge once in a while.

I got an invite to #1’s house Monday. He had some Peruvian chicken that was about to go bad, so he decided to offload it on me. I told him I prefer Ecuadorean chicken, which fell on deaf ears. #1 is an even better cook than I am so it was all scrumptious, especially the sauce. We also got together for a walk on Wednesday, which included a tour of the new FC community center.  They have done a very nice job with it. After dropping me at my house, #1 said “I’ll see you in a month or so”. I asked if he was heading out of town.  He said no but that he was tired of hanging out with me for the time being.

Time Magazine had an interview with Trump, which Charles Pierce cited as “his most unstable yet”. That is a high bar. He griped about how he never gets fair press, the sad shape of the White House, and his high IQ. In other words, his deep concern for the lives of the American people. Another pundit said Trump’s brain was melting. Two more years folks.

My apologies for not getting this out before TNF, which would have allowed you to profit on my sage pick of Cleveland over Pittsburgh, but there is still time to lay your money down on the rest of the slate. My sister will be at the game in Philly so I had to go with the Iggles.

Cle Ind Bal Buf Chi Jax Hou AZ Phi GB Min KC Sea SF Det NO

Super-Intelligent Post

Just like AI, if you keep reading this blog it will eventually destroy you.

Our president, a complete horse’s ass, has been busy. When he’s not renaming shit, he’s threatening to annihilate a civilization. Or maybe he’ll make a deal with them. It’s good to have that option in your back pocket. That’s the mark of a master negotiator. When he was done at the UN, he turned to fawning over Xi during his state visit. He likes himself a ruthless dictator. Gosh, it seems strange that some Republicans are “distancing” themselves from him. November 3 can’t come soon enough. I feel like the guy with his head in his hands at Trump’s UN speech.

The village had a big day on Wednesday. My socialite wife organized the event. The numbers, TCG and the Hotelier were all in attendance with their better halves. We took in the 12:45 game at Pacific Bell Park. We sat in the sun for a bit but then the shade came over and it was a gorgeous day. We were treated to a barn burner of two sub .500 teams battling it out. I did not recognize any names on the Twins roster nor the Giants’. I know a few Giants names like Lee, Adames and Devers, but they were all injured.  Given their record, it was time to give the prospects a shot. The Giants had a 2-1 lead at one point but dropped the game 4-2. A guy right in front of us snagged a foul ball. I’m glad I didn’t have to fend it off. I dipped into my home equity line to buy a slice of pizza and a beer.

After the game we went to Shelby’s Rooftop for drinks. It had a great view of the traffic we didn’t have to sit in. I was not up for straight Tanqueray at 4pm so I went with one of their signature cocktails. I should have had an IPA. #2’s SO, who does not yet have a bar name, so I’ll call her T, generously picked up the tab.  I gotta hang with those two more.

The geriatric set then marched off to Sam’s Grill for an old timey SF meal. We had a private booth with an effusive and engaging waiter, who, along with the great food and great company, made it a memorable night. I love places like Sam’s, John’s and Tadich. You know what you’re getting and there is no messing around.

After dinner eight of the ten of us Ubered back to the train station and hopped on the 7:55, where we were treated to a show. About two stations in, some rando got up from his seat, climbed the steps going to the upper section, and did the technicolor yawn. You know what I mean. He called his friend Earl. After that he came back down, hung by the station sign, and puked some more. I’m sure it was a stomach bug and not too many beers. Needless to say, we got off at the opposite exit.

Since I brought up barn burners, there was a real one last night, when the Falcons handed the favored Packers their hats. There are 46 participants in my pool and all 46 picked the Packers. Any given Thursday. Here’s my picks for the week.  I’ll probably be back at you shortly after Sunday’s games. I’ll use the blog therapeutically to deal with missing my wife, who is now on a plane to DC to celebrate my twin grandchildren’s first birthday. D Pop decided to stay home this time around. He can only take so much excitement.

GB Buf Car Det Ind Jax KC NYG Cin Sea SF Min NO Bal LAR Phi

My Pal Elon

I can’t wait to see the new 4-hour documentary on Elon Musk. I can’t get enough of that guy. My Foster City real estate empire and five figure retirement account can’t compare to what he has accomplished, but I still view us as kindred spirits. One of the revelations in it is that he told his first wife, on their wedding day, that he was the alpha in the relationship. Some people might find that unusual, but my wife told me the same thing during the first dance at our wedding. She led. In an aside, I don’t think I have ever divulged that our wedding was paid for by a Russian oligarch.

Truth be told, I have not been in much of a writing mood lately but seeing recent hits from my loyal readers The Wolv and #1 has motivated me.  I just cannot let them down. I’ve been consumed with the opening of the NFL season. I like Google TV’s “catch up through key plays” feature as watching an entire game is beyond me, unless I have a buddy sitting there with me. I’ve invited a lot of people this coming Sunday, but they all told me to get lost. Though I’m feeling a little bitter, I’m sharing my crack week 2 slate. I’m a risk taker, as evidenced by my NYJ and LV picks. I won’t be able to watch the Chiefs stomp the Colts during the Sunday night game as #1 and Barbie are coming over to be test subjects for this paella.  We made it once when SB1 was home, but I don’t have my usual culinary confidence on this one.

Buf Car Bal Chi Hou NE NYJ TB Phi Jax LV Sea Dal SF KC LAR

https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1014667-paella-master-recipe

Nate Silver is telling me things are looking rosier for the Democrats in the recent polls. I hope he’s right. I’m planning on getting a bottle of champagne and staying up late on November 3. The only downside is I have to kiss that $5k Trump check goodbye. If the new Congress can stymie him, he might take his toys and gold leaf and go home.

Alix vs. Alex

Whose team are you on? Personally, I’m torn.

It was a quiet week here on Gull.  The wife and her gal pals headed to Tahoe. I spent most of the week suffering from the vapours.  The one bright spot was a Wednesday night pizza party at #1’s house. He sprung for the Amici’s pie, The Banker and I each brought a fine Zin and #2 arrived with a sixer of fake beer. The Belgian brought himself. He’s a big dog with Genentech so we don’t get to see much of him.  The entire crowd put on a brave face in the absence of their wives.  Some fought back tears.  Or maybe that was the anchovies. #2 said no anchovies so I recommended to #1 that he double up on them.  We even had them on the side for our Caesar.

The week before last the wife and I decided we needed a culture infusion, so we headed on Wednesday to see the Matisse show at MOMA. Not being the savviest of planners, we were unaware that MOMA is closed on Wednesdays. Therefore, we killed some time walking Yerba Buena Plaza. Howard St. between Third and Fourth was blocked off for a big upcoming Pokémon event. Most people don’t know it, but I am a big Pokémon fan. Before we headed back to the burbs, we lunched at Fang. Primo.  You gotta go.

The mid-terms are two months away.  I caught this during my news scan today.

For Republicans, wrote political analyst Charlie Cook, the founder of Cook Political Report, “the three most plausible outcomes are that it will be bad, really bad, or truly horrible.”

I’m all for it.  Word on the street is that reps in tight districts are trying to discourage any “support” from the President. And Melania will be a no-show at his Dallas shitshow.  At least he’s not talking about bombing Oman anymore.  That episode reminded me of McCain doing “bomb Iran” to the tune of the Beach Boys Barbara Ann. Of course, he was less insane than Trump, but that’s not saying much.

Mom, Dad’s on the Ground

This was the line of the week during our Stone Harbor trip. It was casually uttered by my lovely daughter as she remained relaxed in her beach chair.  I had made a valiant attempt at a soft landing into my chair but ended up on all fours. My wife gave me a hand up and my second seating try was successful. We laughed, we cried.

We did a Saturday to Saturday stay at nice place half a block from the beach in Stone Harbor, NJ. Things have changed a little since the 60’s and 70’s when my family would stay in a very basic cottage in Ocean City, NJ, often several blocks from the beach. I’m not sure a librarian’s salary would go too far in present day Stone Harbor.

We had a ton of fun with my 11-month-old twin grandchildren. The girl is crawling and the boy is starting to.  They were both cruising on the couch a lot as many relatives hovered around them. With so many hands available, the parents got a break and were able to catch up on sleep.

My wife’s brother and his family were a few blocks away and we had many cocktail hours and dinners with them. He expertly grilled steaks at his house and another night my son made his jerked chicken at our house. A few take-out meals filled in the rest. One night my sister got a ton of fried seafood, just like my mom and aunt used to back in the 60’s. I’m not one to complain – are you buying that? – but the calamari was a big, soggy disappointment. I do keep in mind that fried food to go is not often a good idea.

The boomers went out for a meal one night. It was in the same place as an excellent Japanese restaurant we used to patronize that had closed down a few years ago. It was BYOB so LA came to the rescue with her fine wines. My brother-in-law just brought a glass of vodka. Fortunately, he was not stopped on the way. The meal was quite good, but we were a little taken aback when they quibbled about splitting our salads. C’mon people, what kind of show are you running here?

The babies did well on the beach and in our pool. Our grandson was so relaxed in the pool one day that he fell asleep while he was being carried around. We brought a blow-up pool to the beach and filled it with seawater. I skipped a few beach days because I can’t take the heat anymore. A lot of people might say I've never been able to take the heat. We had mostly good weather and one day with intermittent rain.

We bookended the NJ stay at a DC Airbnb close to SB1’s house, in order to get more baby time. I especially like this one as it has a two-foot-wide lowered section of the ceiling that allows me to bump or skim my head when I’m not paying attention. On getaway Sunday #1 and family came over bearing fried chicken.  They were fresh off their Niagara Falls/MLB HOF/MA tour. They are the first members of the village to meet the twins.  The rest of the group will have their chance when they come in at Xmas.  Wouldn’t you like to be on that flight?!

I’m going to check out now without any celeb or political news, but let me know if you think I should devote a future post to Natalie Harp.

My Latest Stinkpiece

I’ve taken care of the critical business of the day, including grocery shopping, wishing a happy 68th to the Wig, and a shortened walk on my recuperating hip. I was fortunate to be able to connect with my favorite physiatrist via video call on my way to Tahoe last week.  I picked up some methylprednisolone at the Tahoe City CVS and am on the mend before I hop on the plane to DC Wednesday. I’ll get to hang out with my darling grandkids for ten days in DC and at the Jersey shore, along with the rest of my family. 

We headed to Tahoe on Tuesday along with Unc and Mashie. We took our Hyundai Ioniq as opposed to theirs since we have a button that closes the trunk door and theirs doesn’t. Talk about a case of buyer’s remorse! TCG and Katie welcomed us with open arms and a modicum of trepidation. We headed to #2’s house up the road for Taco Tuesday. Like a lot of the village guys, #2 is a good cook.  All I was required to do was prepare my 3-2-1 margaritas, which were a hit as usual. 

Wednesday was a little lazy, with the guys hanging back and the women spending time at the beach. We then headed to San Harbor around 4pm to catch these guys.

https://superdiamond.com/

Surreal Neil and the boys put on a good show. I grew up listening to this stuff so I enjoyed it.  They veered into other artist’s tunes for a few seconds during transition periods.  I thought I was hearing things when I heard a riff from Led Zep’s D’yer Mak’er. We skipped out a few minutes before the end and beat the crowd. Being up until 11pm is a rare experience for me.

Thursday was boat day, with the women in Katie’s boat and the guys in #2’s. We headed over to Gar Woods for lunch and then took over a buoy and tied the boats together.  The brave among us jumped in the water. I was not one of them. The evening brought us to the beach. My wife had prepped her oven-fried chicken and cornbread and we had corn, salad and Mashie’s baked treats for dessert. We played a new game called Chronolgy. #1 won the first and I won the second, but we did not go head to head as I sat out the first. I’m looking forward to a one on one match with #1 so I can crush his spirit. During the first game, TCG and #1 got a little chippy, as the football announcers say. Fortunately it did not escalate to the near cage match level we saw in Mexico City, detailed in my 3/1/26 post. During the evening #1 asked me if I’d be getting a post in before my East Coast trip, although I stated in my last one that that was unlikely. Again, he has spurred me to greatness. In response, I challenged him to a cage match.

Before the Tahoe trip, the wife and I made one of our rare trips to the movies.  I thought the 10am show and our advanced age would lead to a discounted ticket, but we paid the full freight at $18. We enjoyed the Olivia Wilde directed The Invite.  I understand she takes her shirt off a lot in her latest movie, so we may be catching that one as well.

There has been a lot going on in celebrity circles. Pete Davidson & Elsie Hewitt reached a co-parenting agreement. I expect that to be as successful as the U.S. / Iran memorandum of understanding. Nikki Bella told us she was celibate, Sid Wilson was kicked out of Slipknot, and ‘Big Brother’ evictee Jason De Puy spilled the tea on unseen pronoun fight with Devens and Kamu. Meanwhile, the Barbie sequel is stalled due to contract negotiations. That one hits hard.  How much is enough people??!! Lastly, Linda Blair has gone to the dogs.

In music, BTS is boycotting the Grammys after the introduction of a new Asian pop prize. Given that, I’m boycotting them too. North West, the 13-year-old turquoise-haired daughter of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, has canceled her headlining tour with rapper Molly Santana. I am forever grateful for my normal childhood and truly feel sorry for all the kids of the Kardashian sisters.

As usual, politics has me tearing my hair out.  The morons are going after Dr. Fauci. I think I’ve said this before, but Rand Paul’s neighbor needs to pay him another visit. I was happy to see America’s sweetheart Jeanine Pirro drop the reflecting pool case against David Hearn. She attributed the problem to a shady installation, which made Trump go apoplectic. On the bright side, we are back to discussing an Iran ceasefire. Let’s all hope it holds this time. Also, FYI, I haven’t heard from Mitch.

OK, that’s it. I’m going to go stretch this ancient body before I tackle today’s NYT crossword.