My New Spirit Animal

Were you waiting to hear my take on Election Day? Of course you were. I was elated, as I imagine the vast majority of my readership was. We took the Senate and the possibility still remains that there will be the first black Senator from Mississippi since Reconstruction. The rebuke to MAGA was sharp, so Trump decided to talk about the ballroom and promote the eldritch Stephen Miller. I’ve seen a few psychological takes on how Trump will move forward and the picture is not rosy. We may be in for a bumpy ride, but you can always give your loved ones a hug.

https://www.nytimes.com/2026/11/05/well/hugs-attachment-style-touch-survey.html

We had a big turnout for Halloween this year.  The Costco candy bag with 150 pieces was gone before 9pm, so we turned out the lights. I had the candy in a basket and a few kids said they wanted to choose their piece. I smiled and handed them whatever I had in my hand and then thought “you will take what I give you and get lost”. Just be glad I wasn’t handing out apples. I got a few of those as a kid and they usually became missiles.

Heidi Klum is well known for creating unusual costumes.  This year she was a severed hand. I’m sure she is a sweet and well-adjusted human. And there was a kerfuffle about Martha Stewart’s homeless costume. Truth be told that was my go-to costume for years, but we referred to it as a hobo. Bob Dylan was not wearing a costume when he visited the Pope, but I saw more than one reference to Emperor Palpatine.

I’m sorry to report that Chock and Joan are going their separate ways. And People needs to get some better editors.  How dare they call Chock a mundane name like Chuck. Joan should have read my 11/19/24 blog, wherein I advised folks to never hitch your wagon to a guy named Chock Chapple.

https://people.com/golden-bachelorette-joan-vassos-ends-engagement-chuck-chapple-12240329

I did not get a post out in time to share my week 9 picks. I went 11-3 for week 8 and I’m 11-3 for week 9, with Buffalo as my pick tonight. I’m hoping that I’ll get out of this abysmal tie for 28th. Regardless of my status, we can all be happy that Minshewmania is back.

I’m Pissed

Now everyone is going to know the real reason I have a bad spinal cord.

This cat had to be clueless.  Or as TK said today, “what a maroon”. If you’ve ever bought a can of whipped cream that didn’t work, you can blame characters like this.

I can sympathize with Ivanka. I got a lot of flak when the Wig and CC treated us to a stay at The Inn at Little Washington, which I mentioned in my 2/27/12 and 6/1/12 posts. My FC friends were up in arms that I was living in the lap of luxury.  None of them would be able to do it unless they did something radical, like selling their second homes.

#1 and I took a walk in the park on Wednesday.  Trying to communicate with that guy is no walk in the park. He texted me yesterday with a preposterous story that we had agreed to go to Cobb’s Comedy Club to see a comedian named Ben Palmer.  He went out and bought four tickets and is trying to rope me into paying for one.  Like Susan Collins, I can only furrow my brow and express my concern.

Speaking of Susan, there is a possibility she may be out of a job soon.  I’m trying to not get too hyped up, but my pal Nate Silver is saying there is a 79% chance the Dems are going to take the Senate.  The idea of a marginalized Trump fills me with glee. And his dear son-in-law and other cronies may have some appointments with Congressional committees. A boy can hope. My vote’s already been counted.  If yours hasn’t, get out there!

My butt has been thoroughly kicked in my football pool for the last two weeks, during which I squeaked out a .500 record.  I won last night, so week 8 is starting out right, but I need to put together a good run to blast myself out of a tie for 31st place and get into contention for some dough. Here’s the week 8 picks so you can touch base with FanDuel and DraftKings.

GB Buf Cin Dal Det Jax NYJ Pit TB LAR Den NE Was Sea

Honey, Please

Dear Readers,

My Capital One VISA bill is $8k this month, so please feel free to Venmo some cash to cover it. I think it is the least you could do for 20 years of fantastic content.  I’m already expecting a barrage of one cent or two cent contributions, so I’m ahead of you wiseguys.

I had a nice lunch at the Sheraton across from Stanford on Friday.  One of my high school classmates, who has a PhD from there, was being honored later that day, so all my Bay Area classmates showed up to hang out. I missed the 50th reunion in 2024 due to my back surgery, so it was fun to have a mini reunion. I sent my brother some pics, since he was just a year ahead and knows everybody. I try to keep the lines of communication open with my siblings in order to avoid this type of situation.

Thanks to our illustrious Presidential administration, we now have a new unit of measurement.  The first go-round gave us the Scaramucci, which is 11 days. And now we have the Zacharia, which is five. And in less than a Scaramucci and a Zacharia, we hopefully get to celebrate the blue wave all the polls are indicating. I’m hearing the suburban Texas moms are souring on Ken Paxton, regardless of the horseshit that the right is making up about Talarico. Kenny boy is the perfect candidate, for the Democrats.

We headed to the No Kings protest at Ocean Beach on Saturday along with the numbers and their SOs, as well as some newly minted friends.  My wife scanned a QR code and gave $50 to somebody named Brad. I’m sure Brad Pitt appreciated it, but he really doesn’t need it. After the event, we had lunch at the Beach Chalet.  Several of us had the ahi tuna roll but none of us were impressed by it, but what the hell do you care.  Below is a picture of us.  We were all in the O, except for #1, who was recruited to be one of the flag holders.

I hit the posh club a couple times this past week and was able to grab a lane even though the indoor pool is still closed. When I was there Wednesday, I thought Mel Blanc was in one of the shower stalls.  This cat was creating at least three or four unique voices. I finally saw him pop out. He was an old dude I had seen around before. Maybe I’ll try my Sylvester Stallone on him next time I see him. Yo, Adrian.

I have not worked on my week 7 NFL pics.  I’ve gotten smacked around the last two weeks and am currently in a tie for 27th place. The only light at the end of the tunnel is practically everyone else picked the teams that got upset yesterday.  It looks like the Rams are not the Super Bowl team everybody was talking about in pre-season.  If the Niners win tonight, which every expects, at least I’ll be .500 for the week. As soon as you send that cash, I can make some week 7 bets.

 

Cleveland Rocks

My friends at Pigs, Goats and Elephants had an outage around 1am Friday morning.  They sent me a text to let me know, but I was already aware as my CPAP, the machine that keeps me alive at night, was not functioning. Fortunately, I did wake up a few hours later after sleeping commando, so to speak. Unfortunately, the power was still out. My wife called so I whined to her a little about how I’d have to go out for coffee.  We had a nice chat. She had just wrapped up a visit with the Wig and CC and was hanging out with Charley in lovely western MA for a few days. Then she’s off to NYC.

I ended up at Toast in Town for coffee and breakfast. They open at 9am, which seems odd to me for a breakfast joint. This outing reminded me of the late 70s Binghamton days when I’d get the 99-cent special: two eggs, potatoes and toast. This time I added coffee, bacon and a fruit salad. With my normally generous tip, the bill came to over $30. I guess you gotta expect that because of five decades of inflation and Bay Area rents. My usual bowl of oatmeal with peanut butter probably runs about 50 cents so I guess I can splurge once in a while.

I got an invite to #1’s house Monday. He had some Peruvian chicken that was about to go bad, so he decided to offload it on me. I told him I prefer Ecuadorean chicken, which fell on deaf ears. #1 is an even better cook than I am so it was all scrumptious, especially the sauce. We also got together for a walk on Wednesday, which included a tour of the new FC community center.  They have done a very nice job with it. After dropping me at my house, #1 said “I’ll see you in a month or so”. I asked if he was heading out of town.  He said no but that he was tired of hanging out with me for the time being.

Time Magazine had an interview with Trump, which Charles Pierce cited as “his most unstable yet”. That is a high bar. He griped about how he never gets fair press, the sad shape of the White House, and his high IQ. In other words, his deep concern for the lives of the American people. Another pundit said Trump’s brain was melting. Two more years folks.

My apologies for not getting this out before TNF, which would have allowed you to profit on my sage pick of Cleveland over Pittsburgh, but there is still time to lay your money down on the rest of the slate. My sister will be at the game in Philly so I had to go with the Iggles.

Cle Ind Bal Buf Chi Jax Hou AZ Phi GB Min KC Sea SF Det NO

Super-Intelligent Post

Just like AI, if you keep reading this blog it will eventually destroy you.

Our president, a complete horse’s ass, has been busy. When he’s not renaming shit, he’s threatening to annihilate a civilization. Or maybe he’ll make a deal with them. It’s good to have that option in your back pocket. That’s the mark of a master negotiator. When he was done at the UN, he turned to fawning over Xi during his state visit. He likes himself a ruthless dictator. Gosh, it seems strange that some Republicans are “distancing” themselves from him. November 3 can’t come soon enough. I feel like the guy with his head in his hands at Trump’s UN speech.

The village had a big day on Wednesday. My socialite wife organized the event. The numbers, TCG and the Hotelier were all in attendance with their better halves. We took in the 12:45 game at Pacific Bell Park. We sat in the sun for a bit but then the shade came over and it was a gorgeous day. We were treated to a barn burner of two sub .500 teams battling it out. I did not recognize any names on the Twins roster nor the Giants’. I know a few Giants names like Lee, Adames and Devers, but they were all injured.  Given their record, it was time to give the prospects a shot. The Giants had a 2-1 lead at one point but dropped the game 4-2. A guy right in front of us snagged a foul ball. I’m glad I didn’t have to fend it off. I dipped into my home equity line to buy a slice of pizza and a beer.

After the game we went to Shelby’s Rooftop for drinks. It had a great view of the traffic we didn’t have to sit in. I was not up for straight Tanqueray at 4pm so I went with one of their signature cocktails. I should have had an IPA. #2’s SO, who does not yet have a bar name, so I’ll call her T, generously picked up the tab.  I gotta hang with those two more.

The geriatric set then marched off to Sam’s Grill for an old timey SF meal. We had a private booth with an effusive and engaging waiter, who, along with the great food and great company, made it a memorable night. I love places like Sam’s, John’s and Tadich. You know what you’re getting and there is no messing around.

After dinner eight of the ten of us Ubered back to the train station and hopped on the 7:55, where we were treated to a show. About two stations in, some rando got up from his seat, climbed the steps going to the upper section, and did the technicolor yawn. You know what I mean. He called his friend Earl. After that he came back down, hung by the station sign, and puked some more. I’m sure it was a stomach bug and not too many beers. Needless to say, we got off at the opposite exit.

Since I brought up barn burners, there was a real one last night, when the Falcons handed the favored Packers their hats. There are 46 participants in my pool and all 46 picked the Packers. Any given Thursday. Here’s my picks for the week.  I’ll probably be back at you shortly after Sunday’s games. I’ll use the blog therapeutically to deal with missing my wife, who is now on a plane to DC to celebrate my twin grandchildren’s first birthday. D Pop decided to stay home this time around. He can only take so much excitement.

GB Buf Car Det Ind Jax KC NYG Cin Sea SF Min NO Bal LAR Phi

My Pal Elon

I can’t wait to see the new 4-hour documentary on Elon Musk. I can’t get enough of that guy. My Foster City real estate empire and five figure retirement account can’t compare to what he has accomplished, but I still view us as kindred spirits. One of the revelations in it is that he told his first wife, on their wedding day, that he was the alpha in the relationship. Some people might find that unusual, but my wife told me the same thing during the first dance at our wedding. She led. In an aside, I don’t think I have ever divulged that our wedding was paid for by a Russian oligarch.

Truth be told, I have not been in much of a writing mood lately but seeing recent hits from my loyal readers The Wolv and #1 has motivated me.  I just cannot let them down. I’ve been consumed with the opening of the NFL season. I like Google TV’s “catch up through key plays” feature as watching an entire game is beyond me, unless I have a buddy sitting there with me. I’ve invited a lot of people this coming Sunday, but they all told me to get lost. Though I’m feeling a little bitter, I’m sharing my crack week 2 slate. I’m a risk taker, as evidenced by my NYJ and LV picks. I won’t be able to watch the Chiefs stomp the Colts during the Sunday night game as #1 and Barbie are coming over to be test subjects for this paella.  We made it once when SB1 was home, but I don’t have my usual culinary confidence on this one.

Buf Car Bal Chi Hou NE NYJ TB Phi Jax LV Sea Dal SF KC LAR

https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1014667-paella-master-recipe

Nate Silver is telling me things are looking rosier for the Democrats in the recent polls. I hope he’s right. I’m planning on getting a bottle of champagne and staying up late on November 3. The only downside is I have to kiss that $5k Trump check goodbye. If the new Congress can stymie him, he might take his toys and gold leaf and go home.

Alix vs. Alex

Whose team are you on? Personally, I’m torn.

It was a quiet week here on Gull.  The wife and her gal pals headed to Tahoe. I spent most of the week suffering from the vapours.  The one bright spot was a Wednesday night pizza party at #1’s house. He sprung for the Amici’s pie, The Banker and I each brought a fine Zin and #2 arrived with a sixer of fake beer. The Belgian brought himself. He’s a big dog with Genentech so we don’t get to see much of him.  The entire crowd put on a brave face in the absence of their wives.  Some fought back tears.  Or maybe that was the anchovies. #2 said no anchovies so I recommended to #1 that he double up on them.  We even had them on the side for our Caesar.

The week before last the wife and I decided we needed a culture infusion, so we headed on Wednesday to see the Matisse show at MOMA. Not being the savviest of planners, we were unaware that MOMA is closed on Wednesdays. Therefore, we killed some time walking Yerba Buena Plaza. Howard St. between Third and Fourth was blocked off for a big upcoming Pokémon event. Most people don’t know it, but I am a big Pokémon fan. Before we headed back to the burbs, we lunched at Fang. Primo.  You gotta go.

The mid-terms are two months away.  I caught this during my news scan today.

For Republicans, wrote political analyst Charlie Cook, the founder of Cook Political Report, “the three most plausible outcomes are that it will be bad, really bad, or truly horrible.”

I’m all for it.  Word on the street is that reps in tight districts are trying to discourage any “support” from the President. And Melania will be a no-show at his Dallas shitshow.  At least he’s not talking about bombing Oman anymore.  That episode reminded me of McCain doing “bomb Iran” to the tune of the Beach Boys Barbara Ann. Of course, he was less insane than Trump, but that’s not saying much.