Super Friday

U.S. Commerce Secretary / Crypt Keeper Ross stated that the coronavirus will be good for the economy.  Screw that, Wilbur! Bring back the bubonic plague.  A rising pandemic lifts all ships.  And don’t get me started on satanic pregnancies. As Charles Pierce said, everybody in this administration is a ghoul.

I have some stories from my everyday life at the posh club and supermarket.  Would you like to hear them?  Of course, you would.

I had wrapped up my swim yesterday and was in the locker room.  As I went to the shower, there was a guy lathering up with the door wide open.  I have not seen this in all my years there.  Was he an exhibitionist?  Claustrophobe?  Or just plain clueless?  In any case, I hope that was not a come hither look he gave me as I walked by.

I was at Safeway a few weeks ago and I ended up needing assistance from the clerk at the self-check.  This displeased me as I am fiercely independent. She commented that she does not like avocados.  I did not have the heart to tell her I did not care about her personal preferences and was more interested in making the machine work.  She casually told me avocados lock up the machine.  Holy shit!  Should I stop eating them?  Maybe they emit some sort of aura that plays havoc with the register.  Now that Marianne Williamson has dropped her presidential campaign and has some time on her hands, I’ll consult with her on this topic.

Do you remember that line from Seinfeld, “You gotta see the baby”?  Now that we are in the Facebook age, it is “You gotta tag the baby”.  Which is exactly what my bud The Wig did.  The son of one of his childhood friends just had a baby, so he tagged it with my name.  Imagine my surprise.  I alerted him to it, but it ended up I had to be the one to untag the baby.  FB also gave me the opportunity to block Wig, but I felt leniency was in order.